Can what you wear possibly be immodest, or otherwise (morally) inadvisable, simply because of the brand?
While at first blush the question may seem ridiculous, allow me to ask, “Have you ever actually been in an Abercrombie & Fitch store?” It’s been a long time since I have, but afterwards my brain needed washing! Which makes me wonder, although I have never actually been in a Hollister store, why La Kettra Bennett wanted to work there anyway. (Bennett is the former Hollister employee suing the company for firing her for refusing to wear trousers or an above-the-knee skirt.)
Biblically speaking, I believe this issue is governed by the principles outlined in Romans 14. In other words, if there is nothing immodest about the garment, we are certainly free to wear it, HOWEVER … if it would cause offense of conscience in another, we are advised to choose something else. And don’t we have an abundance of choices?
The problem, in my view, is often that we are naive to the connections in the mind of other people. And naivete isn’t always bad. If you’ve never been in an A&F store, an A&F t-shirt isn’t going to pull up images of half-dressed young men for you. (Or Victoria’s Secret … women.)
Are there things you would never wear, out of sensitivity to the conscience of another? (For me, the answer is “yes. Fishnet stockings”.) Things you wouldn’t allow your child to wear?
- Brands: SouthPole, Hollister, University of Pink?
- Looks: gangsta, goth, preppy, biker?
- Investment: luxury or welfare?
- Embellishments: piercings, tattoos, unnatural hair coloring?
Hmmmmm… good food for thought, esp. for teens and children. I don’t wear t-shirts or other clothing with giant name brands on them (to me they say, “I paid Old Navy [or whatever store] to use my chest for advertising!} so I guess that eliminates a lot of problems.
I think I would encourage my 9yo daughter, as it becomes more of an issue, to be sensitive to others in her clothing… not by saying “WE don’t dress like that!”, which can lead to a judgmental attitude towards others, but rather, “It’s not wrong per se, but we want to be careful of how it’s perceived.”
I avoid A&F for those exact reasons and others. Though they may have some decent apparel, I refuse to give my money to a store that uses (what I consider) soft p* rn for advertising – the music, the pictures. Won’t do it. Though my sons are young, I value the purity of their hearts and minds, and just walking past that store and others like it make me want to cover they little eyes.
And I’m laughing at the fishnets because my husband totally nixed those the one time I asked about them. Lol!
I agree: no logo tees, no fishnets, no V.S. or A&F……
I will not even go in an A&F store. The fact that the lights are turned down low and they tend to “hide” behind the entrance to the store makes me nervous. I remember a few years ago the underpants advertised as “eye candy” and were for preteen girls. That right there made up my mind, they are selling sex and selling it to children also. I do not necessarily avoid them because their clothes are immodest (which would be a factor) but I avoid them because of what they are marketing, sex to children.
What an interesting question! I’ve never been in either an A & F or Victoria’s Secret shop, but their gigantic advertising and window displays pretty much make me know what’s in store if i step into their shops. If I saw a lovely outfit (say at a thrift shop) and liked it w/o seeing the tags, it wouldn’t matter to me what store it came from. None of my clothes (w/ the exception of track suits, running gear, etc.) have brand names/logos which are publicly visible. Also, if I see someone wearing anything w/ a brand name logo of any sort, usually the disparity of what I am seeing in real life VS the advertised image is SO sharp I tend to snicker (to myself) or feel sympathetic to those who need validation through name brands for their identity.
Case in point: at the LA middle school where I used to teach, one of my fellow teachers bent down to open up her file cabinet and clearly visible was a few inches of her Victoria’s Secret underwear — the logo is vividly printed all around the waistband. I didn’t immediately form an image of a tall, sleek, unnaturally curvaceous and airbrushed model in mildly ludicrous poses, I just saw her plumber’s crack and “spare tire” and wondered 1. why she wore such low-rider jeans to teach that exposed her underwear and 2. why she would spend her money on such things, since the connection between her and the image being sold just wasn’t there.
Fishnets: yes, I have a few pairs, in a dark brown, I wear them w/ knee high boots and a knee length skirt in the winter — of course not for ‘warmth”, it’s just a look — nothing racy or salacious about them at all!
I hate the idea of Victoria’s Secret’s Pink line. I feel it is introducing young girls into the zone of premature sexuality. Sort of like giving “mocktails” to children.
I won’t wear ad clothes either. I hate it when my boys are given clothes with Red Sox or Patriots logos. They wear them for play, but not out for running errands & such. I’m not big on chunky hair color or having multiple piercings either.
I have been known to buy VS undies, but certainly not their “write on my butt” billboard clothing. I expect “immodest” when walking into an underwear store. That said, I haven’t been back since they started all they really immodest window displays. I loved their ads in Victoria magazine 15+ years ago. I even recreated one of the nightgowns they featured. The VS of 20 years ago isn’t what we’ve got now…
Obviously it is a matter of personal preference. I don’t think you can lump an entire store in for being “that kind of store” just because of some items or their advertising. I’ve been in A&F and VS and found items that I would wear that weren’t offensive, sleazy or inappropriate.
I personally would not wear t-shirts that had offensive images or wording or let me child wear it. I don’t like seeing young girls or even college age girls with shorts that have writing across the rear end, but I don’t think you can rule of an entire store because those items are sold there.
I am 60 and happily accept that A&F is not meant for me, nor I for them. When I was 20, I didn’t sho in my grandmother’s ‘shoppes’ either.
I have 21 year old twin sons,. They are scarcely brand conscious but I attribute this to being reared in a home with no TV. TV gets kids hooked on brands. No, we are not Luddites. We live downtown in a city of 3 million and own 5 computers among us.
As a matter of taste I don;t see why girls want a log on their butt. BUT I do wear fishnet knee highs under my black pants, I think it’s fun.
Sorry that was “Logo” on their butt 🙂
I was deeply upset to see a 14 year old girl with a T shirt that said, “iIn case of rape, this side up”.
Rebecca,
I went into VS and bought my very first VS bra today. I may have paid, gasp, $45 for it, but oh my goodness, it fits better than those darned nursing bras I’ve been wearing for almost 14 months.
I have a question for you… it is about the proper fit of undergarments. my husband asked me if i was being immodest by buying a bra that put my girls where they ought to be, instead of letting them sag 2-3 inches lower. Because now, suddenly, my figure is more pronounced. Now, I didn’t buy a push-up or other cleavage enhancing bra, just one that lifted what I consider the right amount. I think his question was facetious, but I thought I’d get another opinion on it. Obviously, I don’t think it is immodest… I bought the bra! 🙂
Jennifer
I have a Victoria’s Secret bra as well. My husband commented on it recently, he thought it looked well-constructed, like a quality garment. Of course, I don’t ask him to accompany me on the rare occasion I shop there. And I respect the decisions of those who choose not to for the reasons we’re discussing here.
Honestly this is the first time I’ve heard that question. Considering it seriously, my daughter and I think that a misplaced bust draws attention to itself, but in a bad way like unhealthy, unhygienic (that’s not the right word, is it?) way.
My hero thinks you should just take it as a compliment. 😉
Nothing beats the engineering on certain VS bras. And if the outer layers are modest, no one knows you’re wearing that brand.
Things I totally rule out as innately immodest:
–Anything with writing across the derriere.
–99% of casual logo-wear; I’ll make an exception for a cause or local shop I particularly support.
–ALL logos to tout luxury brands. I wouldn’t run shrieking from a discreet logo on a handbag clasp, but those fabric patterns that are all logo are verboten with me.
–Any brand whose image I find offensive. I’ve never been in an A&F because the whole brand makes my skin crawl. But I don’t think about it much… I just don’t GO there.
I’ve worn fishnets with calf-length skirts but would never do so with a short skirt. But I don’t wear short skirts anyway.
I think A&F and American Eagle logo clothing tends to be so artistic that the branding is sort of secondary; the logo is a decoration. Then again, I never watched TV growing up and I wasn’t in public school.
Ellem: Do you never wear blue jeans?
Thanks for taking my question seriously. I got to wear my new bra for the first time today an I caught a glimpse in a mirror as I was walking around the mall again and I think I lost 5 lbs! 🙂 I am now sold on the VS bra! (I hope this comment isn’t too TMI!)
Things like this don’t tend to bother me. My 6th grader wears A & F, Hollister, Southpole, she has dyed hair & everything. The only thing I won’t do, is pay full price for those brands.
We don’t have any, but the girls I have seen wearing VS pink line are cute in my opinion. A lot of the teens wear it at dance & they are like sweats & long shorts. Nothing revealing at all. Plus there bras are great, nothing wrong with a girl to wear a good bra.
I don’t allow revealing clothing, my daughter & I fight over this quite a bit. She has actually gotten better in 6th grade if that is believable. The plain tees by A & F & Hollister are her preferred when before she always wanted to wear cute trendy belly shirts. Which I never allowed.
I also wouldn’t allow thongs, I’m hoping my girls don’t start wanting those. I don’t let them look at any of those sexy ads either.
This is for Chrs: I do have one pair of nice, dark, boot-cut jeans that are sort of “dressy” (but not name-brand) — but rarely wear them since skirts are so much more comfortable and stylish for me. I’m old-fashioned in that if I wore jeans a lot I’d still never wear them for teaching. I’ve only taught middle/high school and at the university level, maybe elementary school teachers need to wear jeans since they may have to get down on the floor for projects and reading circles and what not. In MS/HS, however, I felt uncomfortable even wearing nice trousers or slacks. Knee-length skirts and dresses are my work uniform (minus the fishnets, hahaha!).
For Rebecca: I finally started my own “comeback” blog too!! It’s a bit sparse for now, but it’s been really motivating to set down my goals and see progress — thanks for your great idea!!