“If you wore a trend the first time around, you shouldn’t wear it when it comes back into style.”
Surely we’ve all heard the above stated as fact. But is it?
Briefly this past weekend I had the opportunity to discuss this topic with my sister, who is almost two years younger than me. In our early 40s now, we are both feeling pressure to restrict ourselves from certain fashion choices, “because we’re too old”.
Where do you think that pressure comes from? Do you young people really mind if we wear your styles? I’d suggest the pressure comes from our own children – therefore you dress like a young person until your teenagers forbid it – except my sister’s kids are only preschoolers.
Parenthetically: check out the comments The Sartorialist received on this picture, a woman who appears to be 30 years older than Beth & I. People like that she’s not a clone “of a certain age”.
By style personality, my thoughts on whether people should repeat trends:
- Innovator: In my book, this style type is free to do whatever. Why try to make up rules for a person who’s just going to do what they want anyway?
- Glamorous: It all depends on how fabulous it looks. Occasionally this style type can appear a fashion victim; when wearing a look again, do it in a dignified manner. Revealing too much can smell desperate.
- Contemporary: Beth’s and my main style. I’ll let you readers answer this one.
- Timeless: Voted Most Likely to Feel Hokey when trying to wear a style she wore in Junior High.
- Romantic: Probably not, unless it’s a Little House on the Prairie dress or some such girly thing.
- Functional: This is a tough one. Technically there’s no reason why she couldn’t. The trouble is, this personality type is often blissfully unaware when she looks bad. (Good for her, bad for us!) Perhaps she is the one the guideline was invented for.
Now it’s your turn: what do you think?
To me the issue is not necessarily the style, but the way you wear the style. The older you get, the more, uh, inappropriate very short hemlines, very low cut, bellies showing, off the shoulder (except for very formal wear), tube tops etc look. It seems that young, slender bodies can get away with these types of styles, whereas older bodies just look unappealing in these types of styles.
I think that the best thing to do is to wear a variation of the style making sure that it actually looks good on your body type-when we were teens and young adults how many times did we wear things because they were “in” and not necessarily because they looked good on us?
Sadly, far too often! 😕
ditto that! I have found several styles I can adapt for my idiom – ex: the famous leopard stillettos with cork platform and heel…. I cannot wear them with capris and an eyelet top to the office, but I can wear them with super-long dark wash jeans and a business-like jacket on casual friday. I look like a stylish grown-up, not a trendster (or that’s what I think I look like, anyway).
The eyelet top, again – I can wear it with more serious trousers but not with a peasant skirt.
So, kinda what you’re saying Dana is like one piece at a time, combined with your regular clothes, not an entire ensemble. I think that’s a good word for contemporaries.
I think what I was trying to conclude there is that I can’t do total trend immersion – and I am really not sure I ever could. I look better if I approach my look as adding a trendy or edge-y element, not costuming myself in the hot look of the day.
ok – now I am really done posting – ha!
I guess I was cross-posting my clarification with Rebecca! Yes – that is it! It’s the contemporary adaptive thing with an occaisional fling at glamour.
He hee. Great minds think alike!
Thanks for posting this, Dana. It’s helpful for me too. 🙂
I dont mind. 🙂 At least, as long as one isn’t trying to make themselves uber-trendy with the latest bags, shoes, skirts, and blouses all rolled into one outfit. Nods to trends are good; following general trends (vs. fads) is good. I don’t think I’ve often seen an “older” woman look too up-to-date. What I *have* seen are tight clothes, plunging necklines, unflattering styles, and too many trendy accessories. Teens can get away with some unflattering clothing fads; older adults, not so much.
I think Dana has hit on a great point. Also, I think it has a lot to do with what looks good on you. If the style of the day looks good, then great. But wearing it when it does not definitely looks like you’re trying too hard to regain your youth.
Oxanna ~ that’s such a good point. Sometimes we just look the other way when a young person wears something unflattering. Someone older should know better.
dcrmom ~ I totally agree. I was especially thinking about silhouettes today when I was out trying on dresses. Not too long ago, it seems all the dresses were just drapy things that hung there and showed every bulge – definitely not for my figure type. To drag that look out or adopt it again would be just plain foolish!
Yes.. as long as the trend fits your body type, lifestyle, attitude and boosts your confidence, go for it. But I really think that micro miniskirts, super tight belly baring shirts, and cleavage shirts are really inappropriate or/and only works on very VERY few body types (ahem..like the ones on runways) 🙂
I’ve seen plenty of chic older women in clothes *I* want to wear yet pull it off with more grace and aplomb than I ever could, and I’ve seen plenty of older women in clothes that are all wrong for their body, but they wear it anyway to feel youthful and fun, but instead, come off looking trashy and cheap.
i actually covered this same topic in my own blog a couple months back, after a commenter accused me of dressing too young for my age: http://bitsandbobbins.com/journal/2007/04/13/on-the-question-of-risk-taking-and-dressing-your-age/
i think that if a piece suits a person, and their personal style (including their personality), then it’s ok, no matter what *age* that person happens to be. hopefully a person who is a bit older has gained some wisdom about what suits them personally, trends be damned.
case in point: someone like vivienne westwood or betsy johnson. both women (who are at least middle aged) have what some might consider a wild or eccentric, or even “young” way of expressing themselves through clothing, but their attire suits their personal style and personality.
I believe you can wear trends no matter what your age. It is just that not all trends are for all people. It is just as possible to dress “too old” as it is to dress “too young”. And I’m not just talking about young women trying to appear older.
Well said, Wendy.
I love this topic!
Mmm. I think if you’re a bit older and you’re going to wear the latest trends, you have to put your own stamp on the trend, or wear trendy pieces together with more timeless pieces. Otherwise I think you could end up looking a bit muttony.
I agree Gauri. I think that’s what I was thinking of with the term “fashion victim”. And I think for people with a more classic style, combined with timeless pieces is a great way to do it. (No doubt the trendsetters are putting their own stamp on it anyway.)
Helpful comment. Thanks. 🙂
I agree with pretty much everyone here. My view summed up is this:
No matter who you are, most trends look ridiculous if you over do it – don’t go with a trend from head to toe. Mix and match pieces into your existing wardrobe that should include plenty of classic, trend-proof pieces. Most importantly, never adopt a trend unless it really works for you and your body. And of course, wear things that are appropriate for the situation.
That said, I’d advise against anything that’s too cutsy if you want to be taken seriously (that can apply to young ladies, too) or that looks like a kid made it (exceptions made if you’re spending the day at home with the kid that actually made it).
I agree with Meg – it’s much easier for younger people to dress like that because a lot of times people don’t take them seriously either way..
Then you get older, and some people expect you to settle down and look bland. 🙂
I agree with Meg too. Especially the part about wearing cutesy stuff – I simply cannot bring myself to wear any butterfly motif for that reason.
It’s sad the way young people aren’t taken seriously.
Amy, I just met you, but somehow I suspect that you are able to dodge the bland. 🙂
Thanks! I like to think that I don’t blend in too much, but I’ve never really been one to listen. 🙂
I never understood why good fashion sense should be predicated on age. I say if it looks good on you, doesn’t show too much skin (perfect bod or no, 20 or 80 years old) then go for it! We are more than our age, we are individuals, and as such we like and look good in different items. I know that I can’t wear a mini skirt now at 43 (big thighs) and I couldn’t wear one at 23 (chicken legs, not my style then anyway). I can and do wear capris and leggings, even though since I wore them in the 80’s fashionistas claim I’m too old now. Whatever.
As far as wearing young peoples styles. LOL. I grew up in the 70s and 80s. I believe those are my styles they’re wearing. Anyway, I wear a lot of things some might consider too young like slightly low rise jeans with a boot cut, babydolls (love them), camis, flip flops, and jeans everywhere. Blue jeans! I don’t have teenagers, but teen nieces and they like me dressing “young.” They were complaining that I dressed “old” before when I was 60 lbs heavier and a size 16. I do shop in juniors, too, for some items. I prefer the cut of their jeans. I just get the sedate styles, avoid all embellishments and loud colors. Blazers and bold, contemporary jewellry help with the “I’m hip and youthful, but an actual woman” look.
I have yet to run into a 20-something or teenager wearing the same clothes in the same way I do. I will never subscribe to the middle aged ladies should wear this school of thought. I’m not a clone, I don’t see the point. I like fashion, I know what looks good on me and what to avoid. I always want to look in the moment. My advice to other women my age is wear what you like with class and don’t take fashion advice from teenagers, even if they are yours.
The key with trends is how you wear them/pair them. Regardless of your age, you should pick a trend that you like and making it your own by wearing it in your own unique way, reflective of your style and personality as opposed to wearing it the way the you see it in the fashion magazines or on the runways.
I remember this site had a great article that compared “fashion” with “style” which underscores this point.
The only reason to avoid the replay of a style is if it looked horrid on you the first time. Be sure to buy the right size and accessorize like there’s no tomorrow!
One thing that has been a pleasant development with my aging process, I am 51, is my cleavage! Just a little push up and a good blazer can make bell bottoms look tres chic. Getting one of those Gothic Crosses will make even the most conservative republican do a double take as it sways ever so gently with each step you take!!
If you don’t keep up with trends you look like you’re in a time warp. It’s how you follow the trends that is the issue. Choose the ones you wear comfortable with and wear one at a time interspersed with classic pieces. That’s the trick to wearing the trends successfully when you’re supposed too old to wear them.
I don’t know that I consider myself an ‘innovator’, but I know I’m one of those for whom you just can’t make up a set of rules. I’m going to wear what I want pretty much regardless.
The first thing for me is ‘does it please me?’ After all, I am the one who has to have it touching me, and in my field of vision, all day long. I wouldn’t let another person who doesn’t please me do that, so why should I allow a piece of clothing do it?
That far from means that I’m not interested in my appearance or how it affects others. I have a reasonably good aesthetic sense, and value proportion, balance and harmony in my clothes. I’m very conscious of what’s appropriate for a given setting or activity.
If I like a trend, I will wear it gently. If I don’t like anything on offer in a given season, I can happily pass.
At 61, I run screaming from trends, which are usually fashion-y and short-lived. But “classics” can be stodgy and safe, so I aim for chic with a twist. I am influenced by my husband who is French, glamourous and loves beautiful clothes and accessories, fragrances etc.
I stick with things that flatter my shape and make me smile. While I may look at fashion trends, I completely ignore them unless I see one I really like. Even then I don’t copy. I simply smile and jokingly think they’ve finally come around to my way of thinking. 😉 hehe
I have nothing to add here, because all these comments show some great thinking on this subject, and I appreciate it. Except maybe I’ll say this: The idea that you can’t wear a trend the second time around is interesting to me. In the 80s I was busy with babies and had no time, interest, or finances for trendy clothing, so I didn’t wear any of the trends at that time. Does that mean I’m off the hook and can wear the trends this time all I want? LOL
I don’t follow fads (like ’80s pyramid studs or acid washes) at all–and never did–but I think I do shift my style preferences to some degree with trends (colors, skirt lengths), assuming the newer styles flatter me.
I have a question about a particular trend for you and the whole gang: the move away from wearing stockings with pumps, even for formal events or with business attire. Many–maybe most–younger women now seem to favor bare legs, except for when it is cold enough for opaque hosiery. I can’t get used to this. I have tried wearing pumps without stockings a few times, and it seems hot and sticky to me, and I get blisters! I also find the bare-legged look very casual, very “naked,” and often unflattering (at least on women over 30!).
My family will be attending a formal evening wedding in a city this fall. I have a dress (a sheath in a longer length with a front slit) and shoes (slingbacks), but I am completely stumped about hosiery. Will I look like an old lady if I wear ultra sheer hose? I really will not feel fully and elegantly dressed without stockings.
Help?
Sheri, my feeling is that if anyone’s nose is so close to your legs as to be able to tell you’ve got ultra-sheer hosiery on, you’ve got a bigger problem than fashion and you should be calling security 🙂
So, if you feel happier with ultra-sheer hosiery at a formal event, especially in a longer dress, and closed-toed shoes, then wear them. With open toed shoes, hosiery of any sort almost always looks silly, if you ask me.
Sheri,
I don’t really like the bare leg phenomenon either, and never have since I have KP and that’s the only leg problem I have even at the advanced age of 45. But I have found that extra leg care and tanning helps and I do bare legs in summer, but wouldn’t dare on a job interview. I agree that it is a casual and too naked feel, but I’m slowly coming out of that.
It appears that hose are fine these days if decorative and /or colored. You could try some sheer hose in a color, and if you are daring hose with a pretty pattern.
I think bare legs with sandals or open-toed shoes are great when it is warm–I am wearing sandals and a knee-length skirt right now, in fact. It’s closed pumps with bare legs that seem strange to me, especially in business and formal settings. I think that fewer and fewer women wear stockings or pantyhose at all, under any circumstances, these days. Not sure why, but that does seem to be the trend, at least in my part of the country (the Northeast).
The functional young woman thinks that hosiery is uncomfortable.