This excerpt of a comment expresses how alot of us feel about dressing ourselves:
It always takes a year or two of seeing a trend work for a variety of other people before I warm up to it or see a way that I can make it work for me. I don’t *want* to look like a fashion slave – I want a wardrobe that feels like me and won’t look out of date in a few years, and I think (hope) that’s what I’ve built.
Kari from In Kari’s Wardrobe
That resonates with me. What I admire, but don’t identify with, are the people who just wear what they want, because they like it. Perhaps with a greater budget … but I doubt it. I am both overly analytical and easily persuaded.
The moment I understood the three cycles concept (after having read it several times over the course of a few years), I got up from the couch and got dressed into an outfit I would not have otherwise had the confidence to wear. 
Unfortunately, I cannot hold a camera still enough to get a picture of myself or I’d have one to show you. Later that day I was explaining to my hero that it makes perfect sense that when a person begins to wear the emerging look, their close associates will make discouraging comments like “that doesn’t look like anything you’ve worn before”. After all, they haven’t seen you wear anything like that for at least 10 years.
Then he asked me, with a guilty expression, if he did that to me. *chuckle*
The benefits:
- Understanding where comments are coming from, I can more easily shrug them off
- I can wear each look as a costume, if I so choose, even when it’s not in style
- It’s easier to spot great vintage looks when thrifting
One last advantage: many pitfalls of frumpiness can be avoided by not mixing the shapes within an outfit. For example, the frumpiness of a rectangular shaped top worn over tapered pants. Can you think of more examples?
“I am both overly analytical and easily persuaded.”
oooh, me, too! I think the tie-in is imaginativeness.
Thought this was a brilliant post, especially regarding the reason behind other people’s
puzzled comments.
I’d love more examples of avoiding frumpiness by not mixing the shapes. Frumpiness =
outdated looks? Mixing shapes from the 3 cycles? How does this work with the idea of
adding in one vintage/retro piece that so many advocate? So long as it isn’t a conflicting
shape, then?
I don’t get it…aren’t the sort of people who would wear “emerging” looks exactly the sort of people who would get a kick out of having others recognize their novelty?
I mean, I’m the type who takes years and years to stop being completely repulsed by a new trend or silhouette, let alone to start thinking of wearing it myself, but if someone remarked that my look was “different,” (and do people seriously notice these things?) I’m not sure it would occur to me to take offense (unless it were a case of “different” clearly being used as a euphemism).
Vildy – wouldn’t it be great to be able to pin-point the source of frumpiness? Not sure it always means the same thing to everybody. Another example: the first skirt pictured in this stuff I tried on last summer. https://betweenmypeers.com/2008/09/05/friday-fashion-lab-in-the-fitting-room/
It’s not just the length that makes it frumpy, or how it’s combined with the top, it’s got a crazy mix of construction details. The fabric makes it want to be just a pretty, full skirt (cycle 3), but it’s got belt loops and pockets and boxy pleats (cycle 1). I don’t know. Maybe I’m stretching. But it helps me to talk about it. 😉
I do think, whether you buy this three cycle concept or not, that combine silhouettes is generally a recipe for disaster. Adding in a vintage piece works when it alls adds up to a cohesive look, and I think that includes staying within a single shape.
Mella – *chuckle* I’m glad you’re around and willing to comment, maybe some of you will rub off on me! Since I’m really sensitive to the opinions of others and think alot, I would tend to over-think whether someone close to me (because only those closest to me make these kind of comments) was seeing that the new look I was trying out somehow really didn’t suit my idiom or personality. And then lose my confidence.
I’m not the kind of person who completely likes to initiate crazy new looks, just adopt them on the uphill side of the bell curve. So if someone who didn’t know me well made the comment, I might be more inclined to consider that a positive. But now I can just think to myself, “what would Mella DP think if someone said that to her?” lol
LOL, Rebecca, glad to be of service (and not to have inadvertently caused offense)! Your explanation does make sense to me. Perhaps, rather than self doubt, the right response might be something like, “Yes, I’m trying something new. What do you think?” Well, maybe only the last part if you’re feeling bold, but you get the picture.
Oh wow, I didn’t expect to see my name or quote on your front page today! *blush*
I enjoyed seeing your take on the subject – it’s so fun how the blog community really lets us bounce ideas off of each other. You’ve left me with a lot of thoughts, too.
I’m really interested to know what this “different” was that you tried out. Could you describe it to us since a picture wasn’t possible?
I’m drawn to vintage styles (particularly toward the 1940s-50s era) and really admire people like All This Happiness who pull off REALLY vintage-y looks. However, I really struggle with how to incorporate these elements without feeling, like you said, that I’m wearing a costume. For example: I recently picked up a straw cloche sun hat with a black band and feathers, and I LOVE it, but when I pair it when a dress or skirt I feel like it veers towards costumey or makes me look “older” since I already gravitate towards modest shapes, and most people in their mid-twenties in my neck of the woods haven’t been sporting hats. I’m starting to think that the key is to pair the hat with something very stylistically different and modern, such as leggings under a shorter dress or a moto jacket.
RE: receiving comments that you look “different” – I’ve been trying to push my style element a LOT this year and try trends that are out of my comfort zone. I’ve been adding one item at a time, but when I see someone that I haven’t bumped into for a while, I do get a lot of comments about how my style has changed. Mostly, I think, they are complimentary. I don’t think that someone noticing that you look “different” from your norm is necessarily a bad thing – and in some cases, it might take other people a while to adjust their eye to you in a new look. (I got some of those kinds of reactions when I dyed my hair from blonde to red, or when I cut it much shorter, even though I *knew* that the new look worked much, much better for my coloring and features.)
Sorry that this is so long, Rebecca!
This recent outfit I was talking about I didn’t get any comments on – I was just afraid I would! lol Later today I’m going to try to upload some pictures, if I can find one that is at all reasonably clear, I will post it. Verbal description: tapered jeans, long brown layering tee worn under brown gingham check camp-shirt tied up at waist. I don’t remember for sure what shoes I wore.
I think you’re right, it just takes some people awhile to adjust to a new look.
About wearing vintagy stuff without feeling like you are wearing a costume: the only thing I can think of is to consider where you are wearing it. Certain events/venues just beg for something costumy and I feel boring when I don’t “dress up” for those kind of things. But just for everyday – where would you wear a hat with a dress or skirt? Feathers, especially in black, make it very dramatic.
Did you say you are in Western Washington? Feathers are pretty formal too, but straw helps tone that down. Could you replace your skirt with a pair of black bermudas, keeping the top and shoes very feminine? An outfit like that could certainly be worn knocking around flea markets, artsy or historic areas, or even some outdoorsy stuff on a Saturday. In Spokane, there are places you could wear the whole get-up – dress, hat, even gloves – The Davenport Hotel, for one.
Since straw hats go with the beach and sun and so-forth, have you tried it with a sun dress? I see the younger ladies gravitating toward that kind of a romantic look. You have lots of stuff that will be cute with the hat, maybe after you wear it a few more times it will feel more comfortable. 🙂
Rebecca, yes, I’m in the western half of our state. 🙂
You actually read my mind. I’ve been playing around with it with walking shorts and denim clamdiggers, and also a tunic dress that has some metal studs on it, and I feel like they “tone down” the hat a bit. (This is the one I’m talking about – the feathers aren’t huge.) I’ve been wearing it while commuting simply because I broke my sunglasses and need some way to shade my eyes since we’re having such a sunny spring! I’m not sure about sundresses since I’ve had zero luck finding one that is flattering and lets me wear the supportive bra that I need, but I will keep my eye out. (And I appreciate your recent post about dress shopping, too.)
Thanks for lending your great ideas!
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